A Kind Word

We all walk through dark valleys in our lives- where it seems nothing or very little is going right.

Then all of a sudden a kind word of encouragement, a warm hug or a gentle nod of understanding. Perhaps even shared tears and or a thoughtful note are all it takes to help us through.

This year has started with much trial for our family- yet God has been kind, good and faithful.

Thanks to those of you who have stood by us with a prayer, a note or a word of encouragement. We love and appreciate you!

Through the Tunnel

A week has passed since I got back from my Mom-cation to living and surviving my real life.

The temp of real life is so fast, so rushed, so full. At times I feel overwhelmed by it all- yet in a positive light now.

This week I celebrated my birthday and meeting up with other friends who have infants I saw that they too are struggling and overwhelmed like I felt just 2 weeks ago before I went on my little vacation.

I have this visual picture of Moms going through this tunnel. Being a Mom and raising a child are by far the most difficult task I have ever known.

As a Mommy I know how you feel when you are sleepless, over-tired, and over-dramatic. A ticking time bomb waiting to explode with the smallest spark. A fussy toddler, a disobedient child, a word thoughtlessly spoken- each of this fuel to kindle your already raging soul-fire.

I know the guilt of feeling you ought to be a better, more patient, more organized, more healthy, more ANYTHING Mom.

I know the longing for peace- wholeness- and a healthy, harmony filled family.

I know that walking through these days of having young children seems like a dark tunnel at times. It may seem you have no time for you and your identity is disappearing into days spent doing monotonous everydays.

But YOU will survive. You will thrive. You will LIVE.

I can see that I have come through that tunnel and I had no idea how that could occur, For me the break into light was my mini vacation. For you it might be something else, but I want to encourage you to find time to be alone (or with your infant0 and sort through your emotions.

Today when I opened my Bible these words jumped out- perfectly spoken on this topic. ,

Then Jesus said, "Let's go off by ourselves to a quiet place and rest awhile."He said this because there were so many people coming and going that Jesus and his apostles didn't even have time to eat.

Mark 6:30-31 NLT

I know dear one that you might feel badly taking a few hours or days for yourself. I felt the same way, but the old saying goes, "If Mama ain't happy, ain't nobody happy."

A quote I read the other day blessed me much, it is so true and helps keep perspective in our search for joy in life:

For most of life, nothing wonderful happens. If you don't enjoy getting up and working and finishing your work and sitting down to a meal with family or friends, then the chances are you're not going to be very happy. If someone bases his/her happiness on major events like a great job, huge amounts of money, a flawlessly happy marriage or a trip to Paris, that person isn't going to be happy much of the time. If, on the other hand, happiness depends on a good breakfast, flowers in the yard, a drink or a nap, then we are more likely to live with quite a bit of happiness."

-- Andy Rooney

Why every Mom needs a Mom-cation

After 6 1/2 years of being a Mom and all the joys and stress that goes with three kids and a puppy and life I can tell you I was wound up, stressed out and easily angered. I found myself using the word "nervous" to describe myself and I had never done so before. I found myself impatient and tired, and just worn out.

My sister needed a break from her life, she invited me to meet her in England. I hesitantly agreed; with the requirement that I would go only if my husband could get off work for those 5 days. He did so- joyfully- and I found myself headed on a Mom-cation.

I must say the weeks and days leading up to that I was worried, feeling very guilty and wondering how everyone would do with me gone. I felt so scared as I flew away, wondering if I'd make it home safely again. I consoled myself with the thought, "if I am meant to die it will happen whether I am flying or at home." (Pathetic? I know. But I was feeling dramatic).

6 days and 5 nights later I got home and now know that was exactly what I needed to get my life back where it needed to be.

So here is why every Mom needs a vacation.

1. You have time to think, sleep, BE and sit in silence. 
2. You come back feeling like a new person; the things that would have made you lose it before are no longer so irritating because you have "unwound."
3. You come home realizing once again that your husband is the best man and Dad and that he is TOTALLY capable of running the house without you or your constant bossing. He is the DADDY not the baby-sitter. 
4. You see your husband and your marriage with new eyes of appreciation, which makes you feel like you are starting a new phase in your lives or perhaps a 2nd honeymoon :) 
5. You have time to just be you. If you wanna shop, you do it. If you wanna chill in a coffee shop- go for it. The thing is that no one has any demands on your time and you can just live it up, or down ALONE or with a friend or sister :)
6. You get your life readjusted and back on track and have time to gain the perspective you just couldn't grasp while you were at home. 
7. You realize you are strong in ways that you had forgotten or never knew (depending on what you do for your mom-cation). 
8. You see your life when you come back through the lenses of peace- which makes you value your blessings where you had forgotten how. And prepares you for the challenges facing you.
9. You have time to do the things you want to do: journaling, sleeping, shopping, sitting, walking.
10. You realize that your position in life at this moment as a Mommy and wife is the best thing in the world and your favorite place to be and all you needed was to step back so you could see the whole picture.  . 

The Power of Words

 

We have a couples Bible that has both text and great stories that make the truths of the Bible hit close to home with their real life stories.

I have always known my love language was words of affirmation. You know- the person who loves getting notes and needs to hear what they have done was appreciated? I'm that sort of a girl.

But the best story I have ever heard on the power of the spoken word is the illustration used in our Bible. It goes like this: (Couples Devotional Bible pg: 1131)

Years ago graduate students at an Ivy League college conducted an experiment. First they observed undergraduates until they found one of the most unkempt, most socially inept women on campus. 

They they drew up a schedule each would spend a month getting close to the woman. They would "happen" to bump into her Beeton classes. They would show up in line behind her in the dining hall. They would call her for lecture notes or assignment reminders. Moreover, when each was "on duty" he would compliment her insights, her clothes, express delight in her voice, her talents , her clothes. 

The first student performed well. In spite of his misgivings he began to speak to the woman, finding ways to affirm her. By the end of the month he found his task less onerous as the young woman started to respond. She smiled occasionally, combed her hair more often, and paid more attention to how she dressed. 

The second graduate student took the experiment a step further. He asked the undergrad out on an official date and spent the month showering her with gifts and compliments. 

The third month there was a new glow about the young woman, and the third researcher enjoyed her company more than he cared to admit. When the graduate students got together to share their experiences and laugh at the "progress" of the victim, the third student had to force chuckles through self-conscious embarrassment. 

The fourth member of the group never got the chance to lavish attention on the young woman because by then she was engaged to the man assigned to her during the third month. What started as a cruel and belittling pastime for the students turned into a love story. 

This shows despite the evil intent at the start that when a person receives positive attention both the one who gives it and the one who receives it change.  Imagine the place the world could be if we started giving, real, HONEST praise to others and who they and we might become!

This Day

With its early morning for tired kids. After a weekend of partying and a late evening for the celebrated girl with a names day. (They celebrate name's days here in Latvia).

When you are trying to get 3 kids fed and out the door and accidentally zip up someones leg in their boot. Ouch. Sorry!

When you feel like you will lose it and are trying so hard to have it all together.

When the weather is just too brisk and chilly and the warmer clothes are still in the attic.

When your kids are whiny because its been that long weekend and they are not at their best for their lesson with their teacher.

When you have stayed up too late and your patience is ebbing and you are trying so hard to be the kind of Mom you want, dream and pray to be.

When you compare yourself, your shop, your paintings to those of all those how have already sold 4-8 things this month and the friend who has 500 sales over the last 2 years when you only have 147 in the last 4 years and you sell the same type of things.

When  you wonder why you compare yourself and try to stop and whisper a prayer asking God to help you. And bless your shop and bless you with sales and even as you sit listing your next item suddenly you sell a item (the first this month). Because God IS GOOD and HE answers the prayers of his children in HIS time and in HIS way.

When your kids are so wild, they are bouncing off the walls and no one wants to concentrate on anything they need to do.

When you finally have a quiet moment to take the dog on a walk and let the wind blow your head-ful of cobwebs away and you have time to think, and train that pesky pup and breathe.

This is my life. This was my day. This little bit of nonsense. This life I don't understand. This sometimes meaningless existence in this BIG world.

And God is in Heaven and here with me, and all are well and at peace in my little world! 

The Golden Day for Her

What a cutie pie!

Today is a golden day for the only and dearest sister I have in the whole wide world. It is special to her because it is her "golden" birthday and it special to me because it celebrates her. 

I don't have a gift for her yet, a golden day seems so unworthy of normal gifts. And so I wanted her to know that despite living a world apart I have not forgotten her and that she is the best sister any person could ever hope to have. 

And so my dear sister here the reasons I celebrate you in victorious, golden applause; because you- dear one have reached the "golden" age. (they are not in order of importance)

I love your hair!

1. You are mine. Everyone needs a sister, but you really need one if you are female. Sisters have a bond unlike any other relationship on earth. Sisters understand, sisters feel with you, sisters laugh at and with you, sisters tell you the truth, sisters stand together.
2. You are a dreamer. Everyone of us kids was and is a dreamer, but you top the cake in that your dreams were more wild than the rest of ours. I like that you dream big and wild! 
3. You are passionate about Revelation. It is as if the things that scared me always fascinated you and it amazed me how you were so into everything Left Behind and End Times, etc. Your enthusiasm is admirable and I thank God that you know Him and serve Him. 
4. Your excitement for the old-fashioned. I love how we always had such great fun watching Road to Avonlea and all kinds of old-fashioned movies. I love how we used to wear those lovely dresses and such- we have such lovely memories. Thanks!
5. Making music together: I love how we both play the piano and sing. I loved how I used to get to accompany you on your solos and how we could just be together though music.
6. You give great hugs. Or more like torture your sister squishes, but even though I complained, I'd sure love a good hug right now- wish we lived closer!
7. You are a great friend. I never knew anyone who cared more for their friends and took care of those relationships better than you. You always have gone out of your way to spoil your friends. 
8. Reading Together: Whether it were the walks we used to take where you read aloud or just talking about books we've read and when the movies are coming out or which version is the best I like that we both love to read.
9. You are always in the loop: You seem to know the latest about everything, and are a source of information to those who need it :)
10. Our adventures: We have seen so much, and done so much and traveled so much together. I love that we share that interest! 
11. Your down to earth attitude. You aren't too proud or dignified to crawl on the floor with your nephew or be silly.
12. Your silliness. You ability to be silly for fun and for the fun of others amazes me. I love how you are so free in yourself!
13. Your frankness. I am always trying to be polite and nice and you aren't worried about that as much as I. You can be frank when it needs to be that way- that is awesome! 
14. Your crazy ideas. You are a wonder for having wild dreams and ideas- but it is what makes you unique!
15. Your curls. Do you know how many times I've wished I had curls like yours?!
16. Your helpfulness. You are willing to help when you can, and have done so much for others over the years.
17. You are so talented. Whether it is photography or music videos or music, God has blessed you and I love it when you use those gifts!
18. You are beautiful. With your black curls, dark eyes and ivory skin you could be Snow White. You are lovely, from the inside out! NEVER forget that! Care for yourself dear one!
19. You are a good Mommy! With your sweet little ones and your busy life you are doing an awesome job! 
20. You are a fighter. Life hasn't been easy for you and even when it was calmer you have always been a fighter- seeking to reach your goals and aspirations and doing it the best you can!
21. Your uniqueness. You are the only person I ever knew who wanted their room metallic gold and painted it that way- nothing better describes your golden personality than that :)
22. You are fun. Every memory and thought of days spent together and things done with you makes me smile. That is who you are, you make others smile! 
23. You believe. You want to think the best of people and believe in them, your acceptance of others helps them!
24. You admit when you are wrong. We all make stupid mistakes- but a truly repentant heart is not often found. Thanks for being willing to say when you are wrong. Thanks for not letting pride reign in  your life.
25. You do your best. Whatever it is required of you- making tacos, or photography or anything you do you give it your best shot! 
26. You remember where you have been. I like that you treasure the past through photos and your music videos. You live today but with an understanding of who we were and what holds us together. Living today with our roots in yesterday is good as long as long as we don't get stuck there. Thanks for helping us all remember how we have become who we are!
27. You are a drama queen.Crazy VBS roles were done better than anyone could have hoped. Your costumes, your acting, your YOU-ness :) You always have been the best drama queen I know!

The future is bright. I am so excited for future plans  we have and for the person you are becoming and will be as you follow your dreams that God has blessed you with!

I love you my dearest sister,  dressed in the golden splendor of 27 years well lived! 

Lightening Up

I have an issue with stress.

Some people think I am patient. Others think me calm. I am neither, by far.

Lately- as in (since getting a puppy) I have come to realize how very tense, and stressed I am.

Every puddle, and today there were 4 in less than in one hour (while yesterday there was 1 the whole day long) and every whine from fussing kids leaves me feelings like I have HAD IT!

I know I am exaggerating. I know I need to "lighten up."

But does anyone really know how you "lighten up"?

Today as I pondered my life and how I hate being this snappy, and irritable I started wondering and thinking about that phrase.

It is easy enough for my husband to tell me to "lighten up" when he sees me stressing over things I can't change. But for me I can't lighten up with just the snap of my fingers , or a deep breath.

When I consider myself from a different angle, I can see that I am just now like an extremely tightly tuned stringed instrument. Every little touch (puddles, whining kids, problems at work) to my string causes enormous sound (stress, sometimes angry words and responses).

I KNOW something has to change. I know how to loosen the tension in my violin. But how do I loose this tension in me?

Today I made a list of things that help me relax and lighten up, some of those were:
journaling, quiet times with God, bike rides, hot shower or bath, painting.

As I looked at my list I realized all of these things involve silence. No noise. Calm.

I realized today that if I am going to let go of all this built up stress and tension I am going to have to be more intentional in finding calm.

I find myself running circles trying to keep on top of a lively household and working kitchen. You know the runs to the store, planning meals, cooking, cleaning and doing it all again, and AGAIN. I find myself pushing myself and my family to do more, and get more done and do things right. But in all this scurry and bustle my stress only increases.

Because my house is never clean enough. The dishes never stop. The piles of laundry are lucky to get put away once a week. And the garden is never free of weeds.

But if I need to find peace to be free of stress then maybe, just maybe it doesn't really matter how "perfect" my life is.

Will it really matter when I am dead and gone if my kitchen was spotless and my house clean? Of course not! Won't it be far better to look back and see that I lived my life in peace and my kids remember my smile, not my worried, stressed, snappy face.

So perhaps like me you may need to stop fretting and let life get a little messy and start focusing on finding peace. Peace in your heart can be only found when we make time to be with Our God. When are quiet enough to listen and to talk to Him then life is so much more full of joy and fulfillment.

So that is how I will try to lighten up- how about you?

A Crazy, Rainy Day

I've a wedding cake to make later in the week, and with that in mind I took my 3 kids, the puppy and my niece on a quick supplies trip to the city.

But our muffler was getting louder and one bump was enough to knock it free and dragging. Thankfully we were close enough to my final stop that I got there and went in to get my supplies. I called my husband for ideas of what to do. . .

When checking out I asked the cashier if one of the men who worked there was handy with cars and would be able to tie my muffler up so that I could get home. She sent me two guys and in the RAIN that got down and had a look. Then they drove up with their forklift to lift the car enough that they could get underneath it.

The kids were waiting patiently all the time in the car and I was so thankful when the guys were able to secure the muffler with some wire. They both also refused the money I offered them for their help. I thanked them profusely for being so helpful so I could drive home. And told my son that that is the way men need to help those in need- not expecting anything in return.

Then began the seemingly long drive home with a VERY loud car- and me avoiding the gas as much as humanly possible in order to drive oneself forward. It was a long, embarrassing drive since my car was as loud as a race car. and my son was sure everyone was scared by us since they seemed to be all driving around us ( I was just driving slowly to avoid the gas). :)

Thank God for:
-sending us men to help.
-that it broke in place not far from our destination.
-that we got home ok.
-for HIS goodness to us.

In a few short hours my parents leave to return home.

12 days of hugs and playing with the Grandkids. 12 days of memories made and love ties grown tighter. 12 days of parental bliss in that their is so much joy to be had in  hearing ones parent interact with ones child. 12 days of Mom's cooking and Dad's songs. 12 days- is just so very, very short.

I know that when I wake tomorrow and the house will be empty from my husbands having taken my parents to the airport that life will go on. . .

Yet I know that the tears will flow- with the tightness in my heart of never knowing when the next time will be when I see my kids play and cuddle with Grandma and Grandpa.

An ocean is just too much space and water to separate family.

My heart aches knowing this distance between us will never diminish. Knowing my kids will not spend many days or weeks with their cousins and relatives over there.

I know I have so much to be thankful for. These days have been marvelous. We have been spoiled and loved on.

But who can grasp the longing of family and the nearness of loved ones unless you too have lived far off from them.

I love you Mom and Dad! Thanks for taking the time and finances to make an effort to be part of our lives!

When a loved one hurts

My heart hurts for someone so dear to me.

I had no idea of the pain she was going through. No idea of the difficulties.

I feel stunned.

I feel confused.

I feel disappointed.

I don't understand why evil corrupts so. I like to believe in a better world. Yet the darkness seems so strong at times.

In all of this I know that God is victor. I know that HE is in charge. I know that HE will overcome.

These past days have been strange times.

Full of shocking stories and strange happenings.

I find my rest in Him!

Psalm 121

A song of ascents.

¹ I lift up my eyes to the mountains—
    where does my help come from?
² My help comes from the Lord,
    the Maker of heaven and earth.

³ He will not let your foot slip—
    he who watches over you will not slumber;
⁴ indeed, he who watches over Israel
    will neither slumber nor sleep.

⁵ The Lord watches over you—
    the Lord is your shade at your right hand;
⁶ the sun will not harm you by day,
    nor the moon by night.

⁷ The Lord will keep you from all harm—
    he will watch over your life;
⁸ the Lord will watch over your coming and going
    both now and forevermore.

When it's all said and done. . .

I am a people pleaser.

I have always wanted to do my best and make everyone around me happy.

Tonight as I dragged my weary self from work (the work I love) I felt defeated- again. I wondered if I had done a good enough job and if my cakes will be delicious and right, and hold up. I wondered if I remembered to do everything I was supposed to. I wondered if I had parented correctly. I wondered and wondered. . . And when I looked at myself I was displeased- always expecting better of myself.

I realized all of a sudden that I will never please all these people. These sinful people, just like me are always pointing their fingers and finding faults. I realized that no one will ever be pleased with me entirely. I realized that parenting will always have its moments. . .

But most importantly I FINALLY realized that all those things, and opinions don't matter. If at the end of my day I could ask my Lord, "Did I please you today?" And if I were to hear Him say, "Well done my daughter." That would be enough, completely enough.

For in this big world people will always find fault with me and what I do- and I need to accept that. I will always make mistakes now and again. But what is most important is whether I lived THIS day to the honor of HIM who made me. Did I please HIM? Did I live the way HE wants?

If so, then that is enough.

And when I lay my head down on my pillow I can breath a deep sigh of relief; knowing that He who made me loves me. He who created my unique talents and details accepts me. And HE will help me live each day for Him, if I will just ask.

Me and my Boy

As parents of small kids sometimes it is good to take our kids on dates and give them our full attention. 

Today my D-boy (he's 5) and me headed to the big city. We rode the train- for him that is life at its best. 

I loved talking to him and answering his million questions. I loved seeing how he has developed since a year ago when we rode the train together. I loved helping him sound out letters as we read the names of the cities we passed. I loved just being with him. 

We did a little shopping- too much for a boy his age :) We had lunch. He has his first happy style kid's meal at a kebab place. He felt spoiled and I felt relaxed. One kid is SO easy when you have 3 all the time. 

Daddy had a great time with the little ones at home- and we all came together refreshed and thankful for one another. 

We went to the musical- Sound of Music and were delighted to be in the front row. My boy could see into the orchestra box and could examine all the instruments and decide which one he wants to play. He loved the preformance- and was so sad when it was over. It was a VERY shortened one hour version, but it was so fun. I know the songs and story so well from the movie and it was so funny to hear it all in Latvian. 

We had to wait a while for our train so we had some ice-cream and did a little more shopping and then made a dash for the train. Running to the train was something little boys remember and enjoy.

We read on the way home and talked about our favorite parts of our day out together and I loved remembering how my boy loved being little today. He loved holding my hand and being the ONLY child just for one day- 'cause when you are the oldest you don't often get to hold Mom's hand when doing outings since Mom's only have 2 hands and not 3. 

We contemplated the world and admired the stars on our dark and very cold walk home. 

And when my boy laid his head down tonight he said, "Mom, I love you."

 And my day ended with the blessings of three little mouths giving me their good-night kisses. 

Thank God for kids- and the blessings he sends to each of us. 

Thank God for moments when we can slow down and BE more with our children- letting our lives intertwine and making memories they will remember long beyond any gift. 

Thank God for family. 

Thank God for this day he let us live! 

Understanding our Daughters- A Letter to my Daughter

My darling, 

Now you are 3- but there will come a day when you will be a teenager. You will grow tall and even more beautiful and opinionated and then what? 

Yesterday I watched a movie- Ice Princess. Perhaps when you get a wee bit older we can watch it together. It is about daughters following their dreams and mothers understanding their daughters and misunderstanding their dreams. 

When I was growing up my Mom and I worked together, sewed together, cooked together, studied together, and grew together. But we did not dream together. 

My Mom never seemed to understand my dream to live in a foreign land and serve as a missionary. From the time I was 12 my calling or passion was clear to me. I heard a missionary speak about the need of English teachers to Chinese students and I thought, "I could do that." Long before the seed of a servants heart had been planted within me as our Dad read us stories of great missionaries. 

And so I grew up. I finished our family's home-school program. And I continued to dream. I knew I needed to study and I set my mind on attending a Christian college. I went against my Mom's wishes and will. 

Four years were spent at that college preparing me with Bible classes and every other course required to get my B.A in Intercultural Studies. I spent my practicum in China teaching English one summer- and that dream came true. 

Then I graduated and wanted to fly away to fulfill my dream. After a year of working 3 jobs and some help from a kind brother I was debt free. 

And that is how I ended up here- as an English teacher. 

Through 4 years of college and the years in between coming and teaching and finally marrying here I struggled with my Mom not understanding my dreams. 

I know that she loves me- but I didn't feel we understood each other. 

Now, as I raise you- my precious girl I want to be close you. I want to understand you and support your talents and dreams- no matter how different they might be than my own. 

Last night your Daddy and I talked about your futures. 

Some parents want their children to be famous musicians, or artists, athletes  or actors. 

We will never push you or your brothers to be that- unless you want it. 

Our desire for each of you is that you are well educated, and well balanced in  your learning. We will gladly give you music lessons and whatever else you need to understand your likes and talents. 

We want you to be a woman who had a kind and loving heart, we want you to know that you are beautiful on the inside and to take good care of this body God has blessed you with. 

We want you to pursue your dreams and talents in a healthy way and to do the things you love most. 

We want you most of all to know what this life is about and to know where you are going when it ends. 

We want you to live this life and this day to the fullest as you walk towards eternity one day at a time. 

We want to understand you, to love you and to support you each day of your precious life- our dearest daughter. 


- - - -

Note: I love my Mom dearly and in time we have grown closer. I know that she has wanted the very best for me and even though I have not done things the way she would have liked she loves me just as much as I love my dear girl.

Outsider

If you have left your homeland and now dwell in a new land perhaps you have often encountered feeling like the outsider.

We learn, we grown, we do our very best to "fit in". And yet then again comes one of the stupid moments when the whole charade comes tumbling down and again you rise above all the locals as the outsider.

I have now lived in this land 8 years. I like to think that being half Latvian makes it easier for me to "fit in". . . But who knows if that is true.

I like this land, most of the time. I like these folks and their country, after all I do have roots here.

But you know, there are some things I really do like about America too.

I miss friendly cashiers- as weird as it may sound. And every time I go to the States I am tickled pink by how friendly cashiers sometimes are- even to the point it makes me laugh wondering how genuine or fake they are. Or perhaps it just how uncommon they seem after the quiet ones here.

I miss feeling "normal."- I have never been one that fits in, even in the States. But at least there I more or less fit in. Here when people find out I was home-schooled they look at me like I must have grown up and been educated on some alien planet.

I miss fast food choices-that is not to say I was ever a big fast food eater. But we don't even have a single fast food place in the city I live in. And now and again I sure would love a slice of Pizza Hut pizza or a taco from Taco Bell.

I miss hearing English- I realized recently that I can say the exact same thing in English as I told someone in Latvian. But only when I hear myself say it in MY language do I really hear (as in my heart feels and understands) what I am saying. I so miss going to an English speaking church- and actually hearing the sermons. I understand Latvian fine, but between trying to keep kids quiet and all the distractions one normally has I don't seem to really hear much of a sermon- or it goes in one ear and out the other.

I miss family- By far the thing hardest about living an ocean from your family is the fact that you rarely meet. Keeping close is hard work and holidays are sad when you can't be together. If you are close enough to give your loved ones a hug- then DO IT!

But then there are those things I love about this place.

I love that all health care for my kids is free.

I love that it is more normal to eat healthy here and finding local products is not difficult and not pricey.

I love that my kids speak 2 languages fluently.

I love that having a vegetable garden is normal :) (When we visited my parents last time in the States we walked all over the city and saw only one garden. We were shocked). 

I am proud that I can carry on the Latvian line in my family.

I am thankful that I now have dual citizenship (As of the last couple weeks).

I  am blessed to be a part of two worlds.

7 Years

7 years ago and now a day or two past I married this man.

3 children later and we are now 5 strong! These 3 little blessings are teaching us more life lessons than we could have ever have imagined.

We have shared so many special moments over these last years.

I will never forget how we went skating when my dear friend J was in Latvia. Mr. G and I had just started getting to know each other and I still remember the music that was playing when we skated together.

Then we were married, not once, but twice, in both our countries.

Years passed.

 Memories were made. 

Babies born.

We laugh, cry, quarrel and make up.

And through ups and downs we have become a family.

The man with the van to the rescue

I was on pins and needles waiting for my husband to get home from work so I could go to work. We switch like that 2x a week. He was running late, so I was too. At least my job doesn't care when I get there- I just get less baked.

I headed off and was trying to get there promptly and safely.

Then I saw flashing lights in my rear view mirror and stopped since it seemed a policeman wanted to pull me over.

When he came to my window I asked him what I had done wrong. He said, "Hold on and I will explain it." In the fluster of finding my wallet in my huge purse, and my drivers license and the car documents, I tried using both English and Latvian. I also hoped he'd be merciful to me, a foreigner.

Finally, he came and showed me that my front RH light wasn't working and only gave me a warning. I was so thankful for that, as I was feeling close to tears and very late for work.

I waited until he was pulling away to try to start my car and then realized it was as DEAD as a doornail. I was stuck! Now what?

Since my emergency lights were flashing someone was quick to stop and try and help. An older man in a mini-van agreed to try and jump my car. It didn't work, he even thought his cables were not working properly because it wouldn't charge up enough to start.

So I took things into my hands and started asking all the men passing by if they'd help push my car. The first said, "I'm in a hurry. I can't." The next walked right on by. The third responded and came over to help.  (Does that remind you of anything? Like the good Samaritan?  I was shocked these first 2 were heedless to the plight I was in ).

So the older man and the young 3rd man tried pushing me and I was at the wheel.
(NOTE: I never seem to be successful when being pushed to jump the car. I don't know if my timing is off or what. But now I just worry and think it won't work when I'm at the wheel. I still need to learn now to do this!). And of course it didn't work. . .

So I called 2 more guys going past to come and help push and the older man got in at the wheel. Then the 4 of us pushed as fast as we could and YAY success, it started.

I yelled a huge thank you to the three guys as I ran to catch up with my car and profusely thanked the man in the van for rescuing me and got to work extremely late.

It was a crazy day and yet I am thankful that God took care of me and brought 4 men to my rescue. A special thank to the man in the van for taking so much time to try to get my car jumped and seeing it through to the end. Whoever you are or were- you were like an angel sent by God.

You don't have to do it all!

My day seemed going wrong, everything I attempted seemed to fail. The dessert I was making ended up being completely ruined because the thickener I was using lost its lid and all of the contents spilled into the pot- making a mass so thick a spoon could stand up straight in it.

Then while making supper I was attempting to open something with a knife and ended up stabbing the palm of my left hand, at least 1/4 of an inch deep.

The blood and pain, and tears somehow washed my soul. The prayers of a husband and two little ones reminded me how dear my family is and how much I depend on them. A stiff hand and the fact I can't use it, or lift things as usual has meant I have had to set aside many things I would normally do.

So this wound I blamed on a day gone wrong has ended up slowing me down. And in the calm I have more time to wonder why I was fretting over so many things. Yes, there is a list a mile long of things to do, things that never get completely done. But do they really matter?

I walk through my garden seeing the things done, rather than the weeds to be pulled.

I sit and hold my baby, growing up so fast, now already a year old. Today he doesn't feel so well, his tummy aches and he loves to snuggle with his head on my shoulder. I have no where to rush, I can't wash dishes as usual, I can't weed, I have to wait and let my hand heal. And so we can snuggle in peace, enjoying the closeness of mother and child. Uninterrupted by my mile long list, because I have been stopped in my tracks.

And so despite the foolishness of a moment when I wounded myself worse than ever before I can rejoice. Rejoice in the fact that it is OK if I don't get everything done. Rejoice in the fact that I am not and don't have to be perfect, or super Mom/Woman. Rejoice in the fact that these precious moments spent holding our children and giving them our full attention is much more important than the many THINGS we could ever hope to accomplish.

So dear Mommy.

It is OK, if you don't get everything done on your list today, or tomorrow or EVER!

It is OK if you just stop and take a break and let the swirling rush of the world pass you by, enjoying and savoring this moment with those you love and most importantly taking the time to pray for their sweet little souls.

Is is OK if others do more than you. Haven't you learned yet NOT to compare yourself or your children?!

It is OK just to be you!

A Year Ago

A year ago our baby boy was born.

The most peaceful of my three births.

He entered this world in water, which to me is now the best form of birth. (Smile)

He has been the most peaceful of our babies as well. Content to sit and watch and be with us.

Lately he has realized he has a voice, and loves shrilly screaming, LOUDLY!

He has also learned to sit and loves scooting around and sitting down to play. Cute.

Happy birthday our sweet boy!

Joy In Routine

Are you a Mom or a person stuck in routine? Do you delight in your routine or disdain it? Perhaps both at times. . . 

Lately I have noticed how the very rhythm of routine is calming. 

I awake to sunshine. Knowing that this day holds the care and rearing of my 3 small children. 

I pray and entrust this day to God, asking for his presence. Knowing that without it I will fail miserably and knowing I will stumble in my humanity from time to time. 

I dress my little ones, I wash clothes, I feed them. I cook meals,  I kiss owies, I give hugs and make pony tails. 

These are my responsibilities, my pleasures, my joys. 

I know I could leave my young brood with a nanny and work.I know I could do more and be with them less. 

Yet, No One will love them and influence them the way a Mama can. 

I have accepted my place. At long last I have found joy in the routine.  My greatest pleasures are the simple ones of motherhood. The new words, the lessons I teach my children daily with our homeschool, the Bible stories taught and questions asked. 

I have a calling, it may not change the world. But it is changing the lives of 3 little people; one minute, hour and day at a time. 

And each day when I see the principles, the character and the faith of my children growing and developing, I am proud and at peace. 

For there really is no greater calling for a woman, a mother, a wife than to serve well that which she has been entrusted.

Pleasure

Pleasure is the compliment of a job well done,

the joy in the creation or sharing of a talent, 

the satisfaction in a glimpse or word of praise for something I created with love. 

Pleasure is the softness of a baby soft cheek next to mine, 

two soft sweet hands, 

and the heavenly aroma of a dear sweet babe. 

Pleasure is the pride and glow of a word first recognized, 

a word formed with faltering hand, 

and the accomplishment in knowing I was the teacher of my sweet child. 

Pleasure is the calm of a beautiful day, 

the warmth of the first rays of spring sunshine,  

and the scent of a damp earth welcoming the new life of spring. 

Pleasure is the contentment of a long evening, 

listening to the stories and songs of little voices, 

bound with love in the security of family. 

Pleasure is the nearness of ones we love, 

the warmth of a long embrace, 

and the kiss given in love. 

Pleasure is the security of future, 

the promise of hope, life and nearness, 

in the arms and home of the Living God.

Pleasure