Three Weeks-Something Different

This was a pregnancy I wanted to be different.
I prepared more emotionally than with any other pregnancy.
I did pregnancy art in a variety of ways.
I explored my past stories and envisioned something different this time- something easier, something less painful.

Looking back to our birth 3 weeks ago my emotions are positive, my recollections pleasant. No, it was not easy. BUT it was easier than any other birth I have had so far. No, it was not painless. BUT the most painful part of pushing which with my first two kids was 1 1/2 hours was only 3-5 minutes this time. So I am grateful, happy, pleased and no longer so afraid of birth.

I went away from my second birth thinking c-sections were far more understandable to me and maybe I would want one too.Why suffer? Why go through such incredible pain? Why, why, why?!

So if God sees fit to bless us with another child somewhere done the road in life- I no longer will live in fear of birth. I know things can be different, because they have been so for me.

Biggest Differences this birth:

• Was not at home this time. 
• I labored alone until I was 7-8 cm. dilated (when we arrived at the birthing center)
• Gave birth in water. 
• Pushing was 3-5 minutes, rather than an hour or more. 
• Never experienced the "urge" to push or the bearing down that comes when the baby is ready to be pushed out. Perhaps this was eased by being in the water. 
  

Our little man is an excellent eater and takes  nice long naps several times a day. He eats 2-3 times a night. Wakes up early with the hiccups and other gruntings. He is starting to have his eyes open more.

There is nothing quite so precious and dear as the feel of a baby's downy head. 

Nothing like the feeling of holding a tiny person in your arms and having him cling to your finger. Nothing so special as gazing in awe at the perfection of a tiny human created within ones being. Nothing so dear as the comfort a child finds with its mother.

In his cocoon with his "umbilical cord" hat

Harmony

In my search of a perfect place to have my baby I have considered three options seriously. (These are in no particular order).  

A home birth: Like the first two times. In truth I cannot imagine any other way because this is the only way I have experienced birth. It is so soothing to be in the comfort of ones own home.

• BUT I don't want my children at home while I have my baby- because I scream during the pushing stage and  don't want to scare them. And I don't want them to have to spend the night elsewhere because that is hard on them and me since I worry about them. I found this true the first time around when I had to send D away for the first time in his life. 
• Price 500 lats or  $936.00 /This includes 1 home visit before birth and 3 home visits after birth.

Birthing Clinic: This is like a private, very small hospital. Where you are allowed to birth as you choose (not on the table).

• BUT the rooms seemed small to me and even though it was quiet since they only have like 4 rooms for women and it isn't too far away 30 minutes- it still feels like a a hospital. 
• Price: 450 lats for midwife, plus paying for each night in a room and food. In all it would cost more than a home birth.

Birthing House- "Harmony": I had heard this place was like a guest house and really wanted to see it- especially since my midwife recommended it over the Birthing Clinic. Over the weekend we went to see this house and I really, really liked it. The house was airy, bright and homey. They have two bedrooms for women and a very nice, big corner bath. I would like to try birthing in water this time. I like the idea of my husband and I getting away for 3 days with our new baby and having a mini-vacation. They also have "cocoons" knitted for each baby and they are so sweet. I loved that idea as well.

• BUT it is a 1 hour drive from our home- so a bit far. However, the situation is truly love.
• NO food provided because each person is so different in their desires. However, they have a furnished kitchen and you can get something at a local store or order at a cafe. 
• Price 500 lats or  $936.00 including the 3 nights. 

These are the options I am considering at present. I would love to go with the third option. But I wonder if I would make it in time and would know when to leave home. I am always so unsure if my labor has truly begun.

What would you do? 

Clay Pregnancy Art

In the book I am reading, "Birthing from Within" there are a lot of assignments on birth art and preparing for birth by exploring ones hidden feelings through art.
I have really enjoyed the assignments in both drawing and creating with clay.

The drawing ideas were those such as:
1. How I see myself as a pregnant woman.
2. How do I envison birth.
3. My fantasy for this birth.

When I got to the clay assignment I was a bit more skeptical because I had never worked with clay. I chose white clay and followed the directions of trying to see what my hands would create and not forcing something.

I like what I came up with and hope that these will remind me to be open during birth.

This woman is big- just like I feel and she is shaped like a bell. The bottom is empty and I would like very much if I could turn this into a bell. But am not experienced enough to know how. I like the idea of being open like a bell and giving off a beautiful sound to the world through my birth. A bell is something that is loud, strong and open. I need to be open and strong during birth so I can let this 3rd baby out without the pain I experience during my first two labors. 

Many women talking of opening like a flower to let their baby out. I like that analogy and wish I could see birth so peacefully and beautifully. I wanted something visual to help me with this and so created this baby being born of a flower.

Have you ever done any pregnancy art? What helped you during birth?

Quotes on Pregnancy

Altogether pregnancy and birth is a richly intuitive and instinctive process, a woman will prepare her "nest" and birth according to the style of her culture, in the same way that a particular species of bird will build its nest with whatever is available.

As I continue to read through "Birthing From Within" by Pam England many things jump out at me. I wanted to include some of my favorite quotes.

If you envision giving birth in only one way and one place, your chance of being thrown off balance by the unexpected increases dramatically. The more ways you envision yourself giving birth, the more power you bring to your own birth. 

When you think about it women give birth every day in unbelievable places and circumstances. Even as you read this, babies are being born . . . 

in hot tubs, and warm ocean pools. . . 

in rice paddies, mountain villages, and igloos. . . 

in beds, birth huts, and birthing chairs. 

Mothers the world over give birth 

counting stars and under bright lights. . . 

in fields, dugouts, and by fireplaces. . . 

in planes and trains. . . 

in one room shacks and operating rooms. 

Mothers and nature always find a way. 

Pg. 82 (Birthing From Within)

On Natural vs. C-Section Births

I am a woman with an opinion. I am influenced a lot of course by personal experience, by the advise of my midwives and by stories heard and books read.

I am always very saddened and heartbroken when I hear of yet another woman who has been made to have a c-section. I know there are times when a c-section IS necessary- when the life of the mother or child is at risk. But most of the time I would say that c-sections are made for the convenience of the doctor and to avoid any risk due to their incompetence. What doctor wants to risk trying something new or long when they can do it the easy way out? C-sections are also chosen by women as the easy way out or are necessary due to the interference of a doctors who having induced labor have to do deal with the stress of a rushed labor- which is not natural and therefore leads to problems and more intervention.

I read today of another woman desirous of a natural birth- but because her baby was in breech the doctors chose for her to have an emergency c-section. She was sad. I was sad for her. My heart screamed out wanting to help these sort of women.

I think I ought to go and study and start my path toward becoming a doctor who will correctly inform women of the risks, the possibilities and the options.

The stories I hear from midwives and even doctors and mothers in Latvia where I now reside convinces me that many doctors in the USA are far behind the times if they think that a woman who has had a c-section must have another. We are not cookie cutter people who must all be cut the same way. Each of us has a choice and if our doctor will not allow us to choose we ought to seek another.

A friend of mine here had her first two babies naturally, the third was an true emergency c-section and then when pregnant with the fourth she wanted a c-section. She was afraid. But her doctor told her, "No, you do not need a c-section.  You can do this." She went on to have an ideal natural birth.

Why don't doctors in other countries, states and facilities allow a mother to choose? Are mothers misinformed? Do they trust their doctors too much? Are mothers to fearful or doctors?

What are your experiences and opinions?

Birth is a process that is between mother and child. A woman knows how to have a baby. A healthy woman will give birth to a baby with no problems and in her way with the assistance of a good doctor or midwife. We do not need intervention when we are healthy and our baby is healthy and when nature is left to have her course both mother and child will come through healthy, whole and content.