Outsider

If you have left your homeland and now dwell in a new land perhaps you have often encountered feeling like the outsider.

We learn, we grown, we do our very best to "fit in". And yet then again comes one of the stupid moments when the whole charade comes tumbling down and again you rise above all the locals as the outsider.

I have now lived in this land 8 years. I like to think that being half Latvian makes it easier for me to "fit in". . . But who knows if that is true.

I like this land, most of the time. I like these folks and their country, after all I do have roots here.

But you know, there are some things I really do like about America too.

I miss friendly cashiers- as weird as it may sound. And every time I go to the States I am tickled pink by how friendly cashiers sometimes are- even to the point it makes me laugh wondering how genuine or fake they are. Or perhaps it just how uncommon they seem after the quiet ones here.

I miss feeling "normal."- I have never been one that fits in, even in the States. But at least there I more or less fit in. Here when people find out I was home-schooled they look at me like I must have grown up and been educated on some alien planet.

I miss fast food choices-that is not to say I was ever a big fast food eater. But we don't even have a single fast food place in the city I live in. And now and again I sure would love a slice of Pizza Hut pizza or a taco from Taco Bell.

I miss hearing English- I realized recently that I can say the exact same thing in English as I told someone in Latvian. But only when I hear myself say it in MY language do I really hear (as in my heart feels and understands) what I am saying. I so miss going to an English speaking church- and actually hearing the sermons. I understand Latvian fine, but between trying to keep kids quiet and all the distractions one normally has I don't seem to really hear much of a sermon- or it goes in one ear and out the other.

I miss family- By far the thing hardest about living an ocean from your family is the fact that you rarely meet. Keeping close is hard work and holidays are sad when you can't be together. If you are close enough to give your loved ones a hug- then DO IT!

But then there are those things I love about this place.

I love that all health care for my kids is free.

I love that it is more normal to eat healthy here and finding local products is not difficult and not pricey.

I love that my kids speak 2 languages fluently.

I love that having a vegetable garden is normal :) (When we visited my parents last time in the States we walked all over the city and saw only one garden. We were shocked). 

I am proud that I can carry on the Latvian line in my family.

I am thankful that I now have dual citizenship (As of the last couple weeks).

I  am blessed to be a part of two worlds.

Common Courtesy

Yesterday I had to take my daughter to two doctors at the children's hospital. The first appointment was actually only to see the nurse and have patches of various food items put on her back to test for allergic reactions.

We have never done this before and so everything is new and confusing. In general I always slightly dread going to doctors here because 1. Everything is in another language and 2. People are just different in various cultures.

I was a little taken aback when as a nurse sped into the office I was waiting by and I tried to address her she completely ignored me and closed the door in my face. All I wanted to know was if I was waiting by the correct door. . .

When we finally did get into the office we were cared for by the same unfriendly nurse. Not once did she address my little daughter. Not once did she make any form of friendly conversation with us. She did her job and that was it.

I was again reminded that I do not live in my home country.

As I recounted this to my husband he reminded me how little people make here in Latvia. He said if I wanted politeness and friendly conversation than I could have paid for our visit. There are two ways of doing things here- the planned way- where you wait and all medical services are for free for kids. Or where you pay and schedule more to your convenience.

I was saddened by this conversation. I know it is true that these people make very little- but in my opinion as humans and fellow walkers of the earth we ought to be kind to one another and at least show common courtesy- especially at a children's hospital-where the child is afraid already.

A tear slipped down my cheek as I told my husband with emotion in my voice "Let's raise our children to be kind to others, and show courtesy no matter how much they are paid. "

Because in my humble opinion a good attitude should not have to be so shallow that it can be bought with money.



Note: Not all medical workers are like this. We have one of the most wonderful family doctors around for our kids. She goes above and beyond herself, even outside work hours. 

The Way God Works

Sometimes it seems that God is just doing His usual thing- helping my life run smoothly on track without too many daily times of derailing it. (Losing my patience with my kids, lashing out if I am tired or frustrated, etc)

Other times I have a "Wow, God" moment and stand amazed at the awesome things he is doing through my ordinary life.

The other day a friend had a little surprise baby shower for a mutual friends of ours. This girl we had the shower for is not a believer to our knowledge. But she attended our Mom's group and we so love her company. There was another girl we aren't sure about either. Anyhow, we had a nice evening at local pizza place, chatted and visited, etc.

Note: Baby showers are a not a Latvian thing. They are starting to become more popular among friends who know what they are- but it is definitely a US thing and they even use the same name we do for it :)

This girl we had the shower for was surprised and totally blessed. Not to mention the fact that we also want to take her meals after the baby is born. (Another totally un-Latvian thing which is also be adopted here). She was like, "I can't accept that. How am I ever going to make it up to you?!" We laughed and told her we didn't expect her to make it up. We told her there is joy in the giving and blessing.

A week has passed and we wondered how she liked the shower. This evening my friend who organized the shower called me and said that our friend Ina (the Mom we had the shower for) was totally blessed. The following day she called a bunch of friends and told them there are people out there who don't just think about themselves, but who do things for others too.

To us it was something so simple. As believers we work together, support one another, take dinners when need be and just hang together. This lady outside our circle was shocked and blessed and taken aback that there are people like "us" in the world.

Isn't that amazing to see how God is using evening the simplest things to show people Himself through us?

What God moments have you had lately?

One of Them

If you have ever had the chance to live abroad for an extended amount of time or perhaps have permanently changed your country of residence perhaps you have encountered the feelings of "belonging."

6  years ago I moved from the USA to Latvia. I came as an English teacher to teach in a church. Yes, my ancestors on my Dad's side are from this land. But I am American.

I love Latvia. I love living my life  somewhere other than where I grew up. But sometimes I wonder if I am really one of these people. I wonder have they accepted me? Do I belong? Am I one of them? In some ways I have carved that niche and "fit" but at other times I feel such an outsider.

There is so much red tape to living in another country- things that we never encounter in America. Things we take for granted in our own country. Arranging documents for living abroad, using another language fluently, just learning to make the best use of the local products that are cheapest and healthiest.

What are your experiences of living and belonging in another country?