My kids are 5, 3 and 1. And let me tell you, we have been going through some major whining lately.
Their whining voices have the effect on my nerves of someone pulling fingernails across a chalkboard. Bad, I know!
These whiny meltdowns seem to happen especially often at meal times, when everyone thinks that what they are being offered to eat isn't what they really want. Or when the other kid has the book the other needs RIGHT now. Or it is time to go to bed, etc.
I have tried saying, "I can't hear you when you talk like that. Use a happy voice." I have tried saying, "Ask nicely." These sometimes work, but rarely.
Our three old's newest trick is saying at meal times,
"I can't eat" (She wants us to feed her. But I am feeding our one year old while trying to eat).
I say, "Ok, if you don't want to eat you can go play."
She says, "No, I want to eat." I
say, "Good, then eat."
She says in her most whiny voice, "I caaaan't."
What are your tips for dealing with whiny kids?
My hope is that this is the tail end of their illness over the last weeks and that with the return of better healthy they will also be less whiny and more optimistic.
OK, dear, how common situation! I usually ask them "to use language", when they wants to start screaming or whining.
ReplyDeleteAbout eating, there is just one rule: "they can eat what is serve or go from table to play". I know this situation, when everyone around me is trying to let me know, that he wants just rise without meat, the next need just meat without rise and the next want to drink warm milk, but this is a cold, and the last one wants to eat just bread! Well...they can eat nothing and go to play and the next meal time is lunch for example. They usually says to me: "No". Then they must to eat everything that I had serve. We have 2 rules more: 1. If I am placing the food on the plate, they can leave it and eat as much as they want 2. But if they are placing the food themselves to the plate, they must eat everything.
If they all want to get one book in the same time, they need to find out themselves who will be first, second, third etc. BUT if they can't do this and all of them are screaming, I just take it off with me and say to them: "If all aren't happy or joyful, it means if you can't share it, then no one can have it. I will take it for this time until you decides how you can watch it together or one after one." Usually it works out! And the best situation is with Marta (1,9 y.o.), when she have big protests at the lunch time. She is just playing or doing bad things, then she don't listen to me or father, but we have Peteris (6,5 y.o.) and he can help us. She really listen hers oldest brother! Like, I can ask Peteris to help me, and he is doing this very well. For example, we need to go out, but Marta have some problems with it. I just ask to Peteris to help me and she was going out without any problems with hers big brother. The same is with Kristaps and Reinis. I like to watch how another kid, can help with another one :)