Let them be themselves

Its been a long time since I wrote here. But a conversation I had with my 6 year old made me want to write.

Lately- the news if full of transgender bathroom talk- and the whole transgender theme. And reading those articles I wondered how I'd feel if that talk ever came up with my child.

Today at breakfast my darling 6 year girl said out of no where, "I don't want to be a girl. I want to be a boy," and she started crying.

I was shocked to say the least- because never before has she mentioned wanting to be a boy. I wondered what had brought on this idea.  Had some snide comment from a brother, or some fear of something she'd overheard?

I reminded myself that on occasion my oldest son has said he wished he was a girl. But the root of that is that he doesn't like the rowdiness of the boys in his class and he REALLY likes one girl in his class. He thought if he was  girl she'd talk to him more . . . But I told him all the extras of being a boy- and he got over that.

Today when my girl was crying I hugged her and asked her why she had said that. She couldn't answer me- and in time I realized that perhaps this was just a sudden feeling she had. On occasion I remember feeling that way a girl- when my brothers got to do things I didn't as a kid.

I told my girl all the great things about being a girl that boys don't get to do: having babies, wearing dresses, painting their nails, being princesses, brides, etc. Then we painted her nails, hugged and moved on.

But in my heart I kept praying and wondered. Could it be that the fight our culture and world is undergoing is so strong that our kids feel this influence, confusion and dislike of self even if they have never heard it discussed before.

We are in a battle for the hearts, bodies and identities of our kids.

Each child is a precious gift to us- made in the image of a perfect Creator!

I am so thankful for the gender of each of my kids and excited to meet the surprise growing within me.

Lets let our kids BE themselves and embrace the full masculinity and femininity of the persons they were made to be.

How do you encourage your kids to be all BOY and GIRL?

First Love

My oldest is child/son is in first grade and there is a girl in his class who he thinks is the prettiest and smartest in the whole class or even the whole school.

It all started last summer when this girl would ride her bike down our road and stop and talk to him over the fence. At the time I thought her older than him by a couple of years. I also thought her rather pushy- like wanting him to share his snacks or ice cream with her- and he didn't even know her. Over the course of the summer they came to know each others names, and as much as kids do over the fence.

September 1st came and it turns out she was put into the same first grade class as he was- needless to say he was pleased- since he then knew at least one of his new classmates.

It is now April and he still thinks her awesome- though from what I gather she doesn't like him talking to her in school and doesn't sound very friendly to him while there.

But when it is the weekend and she rides by our house again on her bike and they both meet at the tree swing on our street with her cousin and other kids then she is friendly.

D-boy had been pestering me to let her come visit. First I said he could invite her to come play in our yard- she did one evening.

Then he wanted her to come play Legos with him. I told him he could ask her if her Mom agreed and if  he cleaned up the house. They finally got their schedules as arranged as much 7 year olds do and can and she said she'd come around 6 p.m if her Mom let her.

D-boy then went to work cleaning the first floor all afternoon as well as doing his homework. I was shocked to find out my 7 year old can do more than clean the play room as he did an AWESOME job cleaning, vacuuming and tidying up the whole first floor (not the kitchen- that is my spot) . I thought, "WOW, look what liking someone and planning for their visit can do to a boy!"

6 p.m came and went and this girl didn't show up. My son paced and fretted. I told him maybe her Mom wouldn't let her come because she really doesn't know us, other than us living on one block and them going to the same class. He convinced Dad to go on a bike ride with him- which was really an excuse to see if she was at the tree swing or out in her own yard.

Bedtime came and my boy cried and cried (he is very emotional) because she hadn't come- or given word that she couldn't. I cheered him with the thought he'd see her in school tomorrow and could ask her why she hadn't come.

The next day came and went and I was eager to hear from my son why this girl hadn't shown up. We were surprised to hear she hadn't even asked her Mom, and that she didn't even want to come and that is why she didn't bother to ask!

All this drama has led to a lot of conversation with my boy about being fickle, and changeable and not keeping ones word. We've talked alot about why this girl is mean/ignores him in school yet is friendly here and how that it isn't kind to be two-faced like this.

Yesterday in school D-boy asked her why she acts so strange to him in school and different here on our own block. She said she doesn't want the other kids to know she knows him. . . (that makes this Mom heart ache)

So here are the complexities of first graders- and I thought all of this drama would start later when my kids were older.

So Mom's - - how have you handled first loves and classmates like this with your kids? And do first graders actually make good friends? As it seems to me my boy is not fitting into his class and he says he doesn't have a friend he talks to much. There have been boys on and off he said were his friends, but now he says they aren't because they all like roughing around and he doesn't.

Time to Begin Again

It has been far too long since I wrote here and I'd say the reason was because last year when my website opened and I had a blog there I got confused as to where to write. But I have concluded I want to focus that blog on items having to do with Ritzy Silk and wearing silk, etc. So from now I on I hope to post on this blog again because I miss writing. 

If you want to following along on what is new in my business and on my website be sure to add that to your favorites. Clicking on the photo below will take you to my website. 

And if you want to stay up to date with my NEW cooking and cakes blog than click on this photo below. 

And as always my Etsy shop is busy at work as usual here 

In the past year I have become an active user of Instagram which is a fun place to share photo updates, so be sure to follow me there. You can also find me as both a private and business person on Facebook. 

So if you want to keep in touch there are TONS of ways to do so! 

Until next time, and hoping you haven't utterly forgotten me! 

-EG

Happy Spring- Giveaway

Now that it is officially spring and to wish you a very happy Easter don't miss getting in on my EMMA- book scarf giveaway! 

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How are you coloring your eggs? 

We are going natural this year and doing it the Latvian way with natural products- I will try to post a photo if I get one before the kids eat them :) 

Happy Easter! 

www.ritzysilk.com

www.silkiness.etsy.com

Hello and What's New

It's been ages since I wrote here. It hasn't been that I haven't wanted to write. But once I started my new Website- Ritzy Silk and began writing there on occasion I sort of got confused as to where to write.

Not to mention I also have a new cooking Blog. I am trying out a new platform with Wordpress which helps me understand my website platform better as well.

Other than that we are preparing for spring with little plants galore on our windowsills and dreams of spring.

To keep in touch you can follow me on Instagram or connect via Facebook. On Instagram I post photos of what I have been painting or baking of late.

One of the most exciting additions to my silk scarves and ties is that I offer custom hand painted silk veils, to read more about that click on my Website Blog Link HERE

So happy spring to anyone who still follows my blog!

One Choice can alter the World.

This morning I was taking my son to school- we left in a timely manner and I anticipated arriving on time. I hate being late.

But someone elses choice effected the lives of all our city today.

Driving through our town requires crossing train tracks in one of two locations. Our planned route was blocked by policemen by the tracks and completed blocked with cones. I have never seen this sort of barricade in the 10 years I have lived here.

So every car heading into the center was rerouted to cross the other tracks- which resulted in very slow driving and everyone being late for something. A normal 5 minute drive (with no waiting for trains) ended up taking 30-40 min.

I dropped my son off late and headed back towards home. Because one crossing was still closed everyone was trying to get through the only open crossing- thus making for lines that were extremely backed up and with the delayed train schedule we were stopped due to crossing trains and slow traffic for another 30 min.

I was glad to reach home after the usually 10 minute journey taking me an hour and wondering what had occurred at the train tracks to have backed up an entire city all morning.

I later learned from the news that 2 women were seriously injured when having ignored the flashing lights and signal they crossed the train tracks. Their car was struck and pushed 400 metres before the train stopped.

How sad!

How sad that a seemingly small choice would cause such pain for those involved and their families and without their even knowing it they would cause frustration, rush, delay and annoyance to an entire city in the morning rush.

How often we fail to consider the results of our choices and worry more about the moment.

Jesus, be with these ladies injured so severely. 

Help us walk in wisdom today- not knowing the repercussions are decision may have on today and eternity.

My sister- the best one in the world!

My sister. 

From the day you were born I have thought of you fondly. 

Every girl needs a sister and I have YOU. 

I know growing up I was mean at times- not including you in my play or with my friends. I know older sisters can be bossy. Sorry. 

You have always been different and because of that I have admired you. 

What I feared you found most fascinating. (like end times, and Revelation, and anything having do do with spiritual battle)

What I ran from you greeted. 

When I buried my head in the sand like an ostrich you sought adventure. 

I have always loved your curls- actually I have envied them. But they seem to me as if they are a visible sign of the person you are. 

You have always been a spitfire. A bubbling, singing brook of a girl and woman. You have sass. You have fire. You have passion. You have talents quite like no one else I know. But those unique set of talents and gifts make you who you are! 

There have been days I envied your freedom- to be you- to be free- to let go of inhibition which can be so imprisoning. 

There have been nights when I cried for you. 

There have been days when you cried and prayed with me with a wisdom beyond someone your age should have. 

You have driven me crazy and made me laugh harder than anyone else on the face of the earth. 

I am so thankful to call you my sister- because of having the best sister is the world I wish I could gift my daughter with a sister- like you. 

But God gives sisters like you to only some girls- and I was lucky enough to be one of them. 

So remember I will never grow tired of your craziness, or accompanying you in song, or laughing or traveling, or shopping (even for candy) with YOU. 

I LOVE YOU you wild haired woman! 

Embrace yourself and love the person God made you to be with all that wild side- because you cannot change it any more than you can change those curls on your head which God gave you! 

DREAM

SING

BE

LOVE

LAUGH

CRY 

and when you  need a hug

I am waiting! 

The computer screen obsession, by an expat

I sit, hanging out by this black box of a machine. 

Not the kind of person who likes killing time, yet somehow glued to this screen. 

I hang out on Facebook, and my Skype window is open. I linger on these sites, while browsing and doing other "work" I need to get done online. 

Bedtime comes, my local husband is away for the evening- and I feel alone. 

I sit here; gazing, hoping, wondering. . . . dreaming. . . 

I suddenly see this screen as a window and see myself poking my head through it - searching for someone I know and love an ocean away. 

No one is online this evening, they are all busy living their lives and doing their things and I find myself longing to be overthere- with them. 

My eyes grow heavy and my bed calls me, and I reluntctly give my channels of communication one last peek- still hoping to see that lone figure waving at me across the space and lines of Internet and catching a glimpse of their far away face through the dark pane of my computer screen window. 

Nothing. . . time to go to bed.

Stuck

It has been ages since I wrote and I guess I could best say that is because I feel a bit stuck.

I now have a new website- which has a blog section and I don't know whether to keep that all business focused with posts only having to do with the website topic or if I should do all my blogging there.

Actually I am so fond of coming up with titles and keeping my blogging topics separate that I have several blogs started and I am wondering if now is the time to sort of all roll them into one.

So that is the reason I am feeling stuck- keep business and personal blog separate or put them together.

What is your opinion?

Happy summer!

The Power of Handmade

Yesterday I pulled out the tin of quilt blocks I cut years ago- blocks for the quilt "Double Wedding Ring" quilt. I love that pattern and it has so many memories attached to it.

It has been probably 15 years since I cut those blocks- and life has changed so much. I left my homeland; my country, married and become a Mom. Yet with those quilt blocks nothing has changed- it is as if time stopped when I laid those hand pieced rows together on the top of neatly stacked piles of still to be sewn blocks.

There are so many memories stored in that box of blocks, so many careful stitches placed years ago when I was still and unmarried maiden. There are so many pieces of fabric in prints that remind me of "home" and my Mom and our quilting days together.

There is such a power in hand work- so many thoughts, dreams, desires are sewn into the seams of quilts and other hand created items.

When I sew by hand I have time to think, to remember, to value those women who taught me to sew and the chain of seamstresses I come from.

Then too there is time for dreaming- about the ones I am sewing this little quilt for and for those so far away.

Each stitch is sewn with love- each piece planned out and carefully cut and placed.

My life of late has been full of paintings on silk, and those too are created with such care and thought. Each brush stroke containing thoughts and dreams of beauty and delight.

There are faster ways of creating these days- and prints can be bought at half the price of originals. But there is nothing that can replace the joy of creating and gifting something you poured your love and dreams into whether sewn, painted, or otherwise created.

Thank you for caring

Just a little phrase, but with power to make tears jump into my eyes.

"Thank you for caring." my Mom said as we hung up the phone on a 1 minute Skype call.

My parents are moving today- and I wanted to know how its going and where they will sleep tonight.

Mom didn't have time to talk long with the moving truck coming- but said those 4 little words, "Thank  you for caring."

As I hung up the phone tears started rolling down my cheeks. "Oh how I wish I could do more than CARE." But living an ocean away makes that impossible. . . if I were a millionaire I'd own the fastest jet around and be there for all those moments and birthdays and special occasions that happen without my presence.

Yet here I am- in this blessed life an ocean away- but with the power to show I DO care with a simple phone call.

The BEST Questions

I have always loved asking questions- and when I ran across this fantastic list I could not help but share it and mark it for later and print it and put it on the fridge. Our firstborn starts first grade in September and I will so use these suggestions. ( I got this HERE on Huffington POST)

Do you have any more ideas?

1. What was the best thing that happened at school today? (What was the worst thing that happened at school today?)

2. Tell me something that made you laugh today.

3. If you could choose, who would you like to sit by in class? (Who would you NOT want to sit by in class? Why?)

4. Where is the coolest place at the school?

5. Tell me a weird word that you heard today. (Or something weird that someone said.)

6. If I called your teacher tonight, what would she tell me about you?

7. How did you help somebody today?

8. How did somebody help you today?

9. Tell me one thing that you learned today.

10. When were you the happiest today?

11. When were you bored today?

12. If an alien spaceship came to your class and beamed someone up, who would you want them to take?

13. Who would you like to play with at recess that you've never played with before?

14. Tell me something good that happened today.

15. What word did your teacher say most today?

16. What do you think you should do/learn more of at school?

17. What do you think you should do/learn less of at school?

18. Who in your class do you think you could be nicer to?

19. Where do you play the most at recess?

20. Who is the funniest person in your class? Why is he/she so funny?

21. What was your favorite part of lunch?

22. If you got to be the teacher tomorrow, what would you do?

23. Is there anyone in your class who needs a time-out?

24. If you could switch seats with anyone in the class, who would you trade with? Why?

25. Tell me about three different times you used your pencil today at school.

Refusing to Worry

Today my boy has his exam in violin at music school. Tomorrow his exam in theory. And here I stand- trembling in my boots.

It isn't that he can't do well or isn't prepared. He knows his pieces on the violin like the back of his hand. But he is 6, emotional, stubborn at times and prone to silliness.

And so I have been in a growing panic since I found out his exam was today and the hours have ticked slowly closer.

Why? I ask myself do I feel so worried? Would him failing or messing up mean I had failed as a Mom? Is it the pressure I felt as a child preforming for judges still gnawing away at me? And would it really be so horrible if he did play poorly or get up and get stage fright and refuse to play altogether?

I have been there, I know the embarrassment of forgetting 10 memorized pieces which had to be juried. Yet, I was older and a very conscientious child. He is 6, and doesn't seem to be fazed by embarrassment yet or failure.

Today as I had my quiet time these words came leaping off the page at me

"I offer abundant Life; your part is to trust Me, refusing to worry about anything, . . Determined to make things go your way, you forget that I am in charge of your life."

Wow, that hit me right where I needed it. I have fretted and fussed over this exam, and it isn't even my exam. Sure it is the first major exam a child of mine has ever had, and so I feel it very keenly. But God is in control of this- and I must try him.

So wish my boy luck or better yet say a prayer!

Encouragement For Moms

Today I stumbled upon this lady's blog and it is so full of encouragement for Mom's. I cried my way through this video and it was so TRUE and so blessed for my discouraged moments. 

You are a mighty MOM! Don't give up! 

The Power of Kindness

So often in our rush of life we forget just how powerful a word of kindness can be. I have thought about that lot lately, and this article I read today again reminded me of that.

A week or so ago we had some missionaries staying with us from Australia. They were like a living breath of peace. They were joyful in their attitudes towards those around them and each other. They were genuinely interested in the little things and in the lives of those they encountered. They  played with my kids. They encouraged my husband and I in so many little things and they shared a bit of themselves with us- making our days a bit better because of them.

Kind words flowed from them and blessed those around them- and they shared that that is one of the secrets to having a good marriage- a covenant of kindness- wow!

Haven't you ever felt that glow of warmth that embraces you when someone says a kind word and affirms you in some way. I know I have and those kind words go with us- sticking in the fabric of our lives- reminding us to be better people and carry on strong.

Yesterday at the dentist the hygienist commented on how well cared for our kid's teeth are- she asked if I brush them or they do. I told her we both brush their teeth- she said, "You are an active Mom!" The praise in her voice reaffirming the hard work I put into dental hygiene and carrying for my kids was affirmed in that one little phrase. This woman was anti-typical to so many people I meet here. She was positive, gentle, and affirmative to both the kids and I, how thankful I am for those little gestures of kindness that make this world more lovely.

So how about YOU and me, how are we spreading kindness today?

Pride and Thanks

Days fly by in this race of life. Days filled up with raising 3 kids, gardening, running kids about, painting, cooking and being a wife and all.

Spring is slowing making herself known and it is like being reacquainted with an old friend- the greenness of it all- somehow I forget every winter just how green this beautiful place is. The leaves have burst open, the tulips are waving their fiery heads. Aww. . . . how spring delights the senses.

I want to stop and express my thanks to the One who created all this. Thanks for provision, thanks for good times as well as hard- because He uses all of this to make us who we are.

We have been working hard at reading for our soon to be 7 year old, he must start school come Autumn and due to our dual language family and his learning to read already a bit in both languages his reading in Latvian is behind what it ought to be. Dad has taken over this "fight" and the Legos have been put away until he gets this mastered. He is reading, though slowly and is making improvements (though not without a daily quarrel on the matter).

I am so thankful that his teacher sees the progress and praised his good behavior this week at his kindergarten lesson. That was a like a breath of fresh air to this Mama's soul.

I am also so thankful my husband stepped in to fight this battle with out very stubborn boy who would rather be doing ANYTHING to avoid homework and reading practice. Since he stepped in our boy's respect issues have subsided and he knows his place again. We Mom's need to let our husbands rule these growing men in our homes. . .

Thankfulness - that somehow God works all things out for His good.

Mothers

From the moment you discover that your body harbors a life, a growing person you become a mother.

There is something so pure, so deep, so profoundly mysterious about motherhood that perhaps no one will ever comprehend it.

We who were once babes ourselves- blossom, mature and become the vessels through which all life continues.

Mothers- when we choose to let our body become the growing home of a person we are forever changed. We can never been the carefree girls we once were.

Our bodies are grown, stretched, wrenched with pain and we succumb to this change- some willingly, some with resistance- and life is born through us.

And then begins the coddling, and sleepless nights caring for this little soul.

We shed many tears, we mothers; tears of fear, guilt, worry, concern, joy and pleasure. And these tears wash the edges and roughness from the humans we are- we become stronger more beautiful souls.

We run, we catch, we scold, we hug- and somehow these little people grow up- and their characters emerge.

We then begin to fret and worry over the people they are becoming and the lives they will live. Their failures are our lashings, their reprimands our scouring, their tears the bitter salt rubbed into wounds.

Sometimes we think we can do it all- sometimes we forget the place fathers hold and the guiding force we must let him take in these lives. Then suddenly we let go, and leave him the reins- and he guides these stubborn ones with a gentle hand and they stop their headless dashing. Let's let these fathers do more in the running of our households- our kids need that and so does our sanity.

Mothers- whose motherly power love will make her bold as a lion, whose very character seems to change in the process of motherhood, whose depths are fathomless, and love abounding. Thank you for bearing us life- thank you for guiding our faltering steps and believing is us.

Thanks for being our Mothers.

Cultivating Thankfulness

At the beginning of 2015 I felt a need to work on a thankful spirit in my family.

Kids are so prone to entitlement in our times- and they fuss and complain and have a lack of thankfulness that is rather shocking at times.

I looked into my own heart and realized how much it hurts me when I ship an international gift- and never even hear a word that the receiver got the package I sent. I realized that not receiving thanks is painful to the giver and harmful to the one receiving.

I make a plan to endeavor to cultivate thankfulness in my life and in my home this year- because there is no other better way to teach our children then by example.

These are the ideas I had at the beginning of the year and that I am trying to practice.

• Write thank you notes - I have been trying to write hand-written ones- like we used to do growing up because that is so rare in our times-and hand-written notes are so special. If the gift was something given to my child who can't yet write then I have them draw pictures on the card as an expression of thanks (if they will cooperate)
• Be sure to thank those who assist me/us: clerks, doctors,strangers,etc. 
• Share those items we no longer need- rather than selling them- and when the kids have too much. 
• Make gifts- don't buy so much- use the talents I/we have and be thankful we have them. 
• Act Respectfully- Our kids will not respect their teachers if they hear us belittle them to our spouses. 
• Acts of Kindness- Say thanks to someone who always serves you and never gets appreciated (postal carriers, those who work in the places we always go and know their faces but not their names) by gifting them something baked or a gift card. 

How are you cultivating thankfulness in your family? I'd love to get more ideas! 

For Mom's

As a Mom there is something so special in feeling your kids appreciate you and and the work you are instilling in their lives.

I am so thankful for MY Mom who taught me to cook, sew, create art, care for babies and be womanly. In honor of Moms I am hosting a giveaway for a give certificate for YOUR Mom! Enter now to win her a gift certificate!


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Finding Peace

John 14: 27 Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid. 

Bible Gateway

It is easy to run in circles- overcome by stress. 

But this God- who draws broken, scared, angry, hurting, people to Himself seeks to give us peace. 

This peace that is beyond anything the world understands. 

This peace that is found in meeting God in calm and quiet- letting Him still our hearts. 

This is peace- the kind I find when I take a moment to be still before my Creator and let Him calm and soothe my heart.